Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
