U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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