you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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