Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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