You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
