Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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