you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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