Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
