Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize