After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
