So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
