just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
