we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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