We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
