I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
