he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
