would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
