I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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