Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
