were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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