I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
