8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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