And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
