its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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