Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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