My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
This show inspires me to have sex in space
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
