I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
