Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
