Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
