By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
