dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
