She announced her abortion via fbk
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
