how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Bring me that man meat
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
