I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
