Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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