left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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