trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
