We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize