I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
