is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
