I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
