I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
