Can Purell be used as lube?
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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