I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
