The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
