The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
