im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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