Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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