its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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