Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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